Over 300 brave souls risked life and limb to attend the Reception of Associate Grand Conductress Stephanie Hoye. Pigs were flying everywhere and there was lots of laughter and fun. Someone messed us and printed the wrong speech, so she was forced to improvise and try to give it from memory - not so easy at her advanced age!
For those who want to know what she was really going to say, here it is. If you don't care what she had to say, CLICK HERE for pictures from Rodger Collins!
Good Afternoon. Thank you so much for coming to Analia Chapter today to honor the station of Associate Grand Conductress.
Associate Grand Conductress – WOW!
So, since good discipline is essential to the success of our order, what exactly is “grand” good discipline? What is it like, what’s required to be the Associate Grand Conductress?
First of all – and for those of you who aspire to this position, listen carefully – as soon as you are elected you are required to pull out your checkbook. You have to pay for:
• Your installation dress
• Forever dress
• Luncheon suit
• Travel dress
• The installation dinner
• Grand officer gifts
• Gifts for Christmas and unbirthday parties
• An endless stream of luncheons and dinners throughout the year
• And a partridge in a pear tree.
Make sure you keep that checking account full and checks at the ready because just when you think they’re wrung every last nickel out of you, they say those four dreaded little words.
And then, Oh, by the way, by virtue of being elected, you are now on the:
• Standard works committee,
• Worthy Grand Matron’s Special Project committee
• Ex-officio on the Charities Fund committee
• Ex-officio on the Finance committee
• Ex-officio on the Session Site Selection committee
• And, oh, by the way, you are also the fraternal correspondent for all Grand Chapters M through Z which means you have to read their proceedings and file a report on certain things about them.
Now, my big sister Gerry has to read A through L, but please don’t feel sorry for her. It has recently come to my attention that there are 61 other Grand jurisdictions, which means we should have about 30 apiece. However, when I counted, there were 21 in A-L and 40 in M-Z. Next year that will be just fine, but right now – it sucks!
Oh, by the way, several things had to be done right away.
• My session chairmen had to be named so they could start their official duties on the Grand chapter properties committee. Thanks Paula Sonker and Dianna Kaspar!
• My decorations chairman had to be appointed so she could work with the session chairmen. Thanks Louise Day!
• My Tellers chairman also had to be appointed so he could start working on the tellers committee. Thanks Alan Sawyer!
• A decision on the gift for Gerry’s grand officers when she is WGM had to be made and the gifts had to be started. Thanks mysterious person who is making the mysterious and wonderful gifts!
And, oh, by the way – you are in charge of the Grand Officers unbirthday party. You need to
• Arrange for the place
• Decide on the menu
• Send out the invitations
• Purchase the cake
• Arrange for decorations
• And, try and collect the money from those slippery Grand officers! Believe me, that’s the hardest part!
And, oh, by the way – you are in charge of getting the quilts made that are presented to the WGM and WGP at the farewell dinner. Now, quilts imply sewing and that’s not my forte. I have a sewing machine but only for dire emergencies. It rarely sees the light of day. In fact, when I had to pull it out the other day to work on my brag rags, I couldn’t find the instruction manual and it took me 30 minutes to figure out how to thread it. However, I discovered that one of my new dearest friends, Cindy Garrett, is a fantastic quilter and all I really had to do was:
• beg her for help
• collect money from those slippery Grand officers
• distribute the squares
• bug them to get them back to Cindy
• and sit back and look good knowing she will do a fantastic job! Right, Cindy?
Oh, by the way, you need to start making lists of people who can potentially be Grand Officers, Grand Representatives, Deputy Instructors and committee members. If you ever wonder if we are observing you – we are! We are looking at:
• How you do your work – is it from memory, or do you read it and do you know things that are found in the fine print and Book of Instruction?
• Do you work for your Chapter? Are you at all the fundraisers and do you work in the kitchen and help clean up? Do you take offices?
• Do you travel – in your area, around the state, out of state, to regular Chapter meetings or just to special events?
• Are you fun to be around and a happy person?
We are watching you and taking notes!
And finally, oh, by the way, you need to start thinking about:
• Pins for Grand officers and Deputies
• Gifts for just about everyone on earth
• Deputy bags
• Sales items for charities
• Holders for pins and dues cards
• Dress and shoe bags
• Carry ins
• Candy bags
• Brag rags
• Dresses, dresses and more dresses
• And a partridge in a pear tree.
Man am I tired! It’s a big, daunting job, but I am so grateful to have it and determined to do my very best for all of you. Thank you so much for electing me.
Our country has dire problems, but I don’t believe we should rely on politicians, government agencies or other people to solve most of them. It doesn’t matter what party you identify with or what your religious beliefs are, we can all have an impact. Most people don’t choose to be hungry or homeless or jobless. But we can choose to help them.
I believe in the axiom, “Think globally, act locally.” Envision what you want the world to be like and start working on achieving that in your own home, community, county and state.
What can you do to make things better in your neighborhood or town? That’s why projects that support local food banks and schools and other local community needs will be my focus. I want to make things better for the people in my community. When we all focus on making our own communities better, we are like the rock in the pond. We create the ripples that affect more people for good.
Today, instead of corsages or gifts, I am throwing a small rock into the pond. WM Sheila, please accept this check made out to Analia Chapter which I hope you will in turn donate to the Carol Rowe Memorial Food Bank in Edmonds.
(Then she introduced everyone in the room and even made all those who have not been Deputies or Grand Representatives stand so she could check them out.)
I would like to thank my chairpersons for today’s event without whom all this would not have been possible. Kim Norton and Jan Etchison were my general chairmen and I was really worried about that! They wouldn’t allow me to have any say in anything except the lunch menu and my speech. I am relieved and grateful to the two of you for your efforts. I can always count on you for wonderful work and I truly appreciate your friendship. I am also most grateful to the Portrait Grand Family who cooked and served our delicious luncheon. I am so lucky to be part of that group. Please help me thank them.
To Don and Jan Etchison, you are so special to me. Make no mistake about it – Don may be my official escort and do all the escorting and get introduced, but Jan is just as important and as much of the team. Her contributions make my life easier and help keep us moving forward. She says she is the escort to the escort, but I say I have two escorts and both of them are crucial to me. Please help me thank them for all that they do.
To the members of Analia Chapter, thank you so much for your assistance. I couldn’t do this without you and I appreciate you more than words can ever say.
To everyone here, your presence is the best gift you could ever give me. Thank you so much for coming and always remember that laughter is the best medicine.